Possession Obsession Manipulation

when will you say that you truly love someone?

is it when you give them everything?

or when you are being possessive, obsessive and manipulative?

some people just play love. playing to tend breaking someone’s feelings. sometimes we do anything even using someone to get what we want or to get closer to that person we love. maybe because we don't have guts or we are afraid of the outcome in the first place, we knew that there is no way for love. But still we try our luck even in the end we lose. We seize every moment we spent together with the person we love, to the extent we think there might be a reason to fantasized that there be a happy ending. We were blinded by the fact friendship is the only thing they can offer to us but that friendship is mixed by our illusions that there's might be something in common. Because, we thought of the special treatment they give us but the truth is, it is their way of preserving friendship not only between us and them but also to other people.

We start pretending and assuming from that person we love. We pretend that we are not afraid that in the end we lose but we still do this to feed our fantasies. We assume that the friendship their offering is love.

Until we start possessing them, we start to make sure that they are okay everyday and every night. We give them absurd attentions and care. We react dense when we saw them talking, mingling, having fun with other people. Till we manipulate them, manipulate that we don’t want them to meet new friends because we are afraid that they will forget us. Even their personal things we give ridiculous concerns. We put standards for them, giving them guidelines what should they do and not to do, who should talk to and who should not, where to go to and where not to go.

But is not love anymore, it became obsession sometimes lust. And when they think that we are getting exaggerated about how we feel towards them. And when they tell us not to be manipulative, we become emotional, we start expressing indirectly how we feel. We look for someone to shift our feelings, for that person who hurt us for them to know that we are strong and that we are not affected. But the truth is, we are just fooling ourselves, we hurt ourselves even more.

This unhealthy situation should be avoided from the very start, if we know that there will be no way for you, do something else or find someone else. Don’t hope for nothing, fantasies are pleasant feelings but know where to stop. And don’t set your mind, feelings, and energy for a person who doesn’t deserve you because when you fall fast, you fall hard and its painful.

Be positive, objective and be realistic.

oNzey